Recent Ted Casablanca Blind Items....(they totally drive me crazy and i refuse to suffer in silence ANYMORE!!!!!!! who do you bitches think it is??)............

One Domestically Disturbed Blind Vice

"Everybody adores Madeline Max-It, 'cause girlfriend has the shit goin' on. Mads went from being a plain, mousy gal to a svelte superstudstress. Hit endeavors, a hottie partner and a family unit helped seal the deal for the curvy babe, whose detractors round Hollywood were simply seething over the fact that M.M.I. seems to have just a little too much of a good thing.

Well, those naysayers can relax.

Not only is Mad's spouse more partial to the types who, say, fill out pants a little better than does our Madeline (however, M. sports them as best as any femme does, must say), but more and more folks are getting hip to the extramarital fact that is Mads and her hunky costar Mike Mouthful.

Yep, you got it: Mads apparently doesn't mind so much when her hubby cheats with the fellahs, thanks to Mike's sizable offscreen shenanigans (on par with those onscreen, to be sure).

But Mads and Mikey sure better be more selective about where they tongue--and digit--wrestle. Too many parties are starting to serve them up, verbally speaking, before and after the raspberry-and-chocolate soufflé

.....and its not: Heather Locklear, Richie Sambora, Charlie Sheen, Denise Richards, Courteney Cox, David Arquette"

ok sluts.....i'm thinking Reese Witherspoon is Madeline....i don't know who Mike is, but possibly Joaquin Pheonix... or Sarah J Parker....but who would her costar be...oh...that guy in that new movie she made that looks like crap...the one where she meets some dudes family....hmm....who is gayer Matty Broderick or Ryan Philippe??? good god, ryan is a hot bitch. ok next.....

--------------------BLIND ITEM #2------------------------

"I'm so over my high school days that I don't even know where my friggin' yearbook is. Aren't you?Well, you me and Drew Barrymore are all prolly more adjusted than former teen heartthrob Jumbo Jackoff. Girls crushed on him. Guys secretly wanted to dress like him. And moms were like, eh, he's not exactly David Cassidy, but he's okay.

Now, we've heard tales of woebegone child stars. They get hooked on crack and rob convenience stores. They bloat up and show up on The Surreal Life. Oddly enuff, J.J. is not one of these types of dudes.

He's moved on. He's had plenty of success as a stern adult. Jackoff is, like, totally settled. He's got a nice family and a hefty, respectable workload--which is exactly why his chums don't understand why he's such a damn douche bag, as of late.

For ince, when jerky Jack meets people, and I mean equally famous folks, he tells them not to mention his teenyboppin' past--under no circumstances (or he'll smack somebody, no joke). He even got his number-two pencils in a bunch at a wedding and accused a perfectly nice couple of mocking him when they very obviously were not.

I think J.J. should dip into his royalties and get some therapy. 'Cause if Jackoff keeps up the nasty, one of these days, someone's gonna bash him over the head with a lunch tray in line at the studio commissary.Come to think of it, I think somebody already did

....and it ain't: Joe(y) Lawrence, Jason Priestly, Danny Bonaduce"

¶ 1:14 AM