NO MORE....................

COFFEEEEE!!! EVER!!!!!!!!! i made the mistake of drinking an Iced Coffee from le starbucks at 7pm and am now in ANXIETY HELL!!!!! this sucks. i've done everything i can possibly do in this state and i have to try to get to sleep eventually so i can take my car in for some hot service action in the early early monrning. i seriously love taking my car to get serviced because they give me a rent-a-car that is usually hotter than my own car and i get to pretend that i'm on vacay! I love that my service manager also knows who i am when i call his ass. that's way hot. i called that bitch and he answered like we were bff.

me: ring ring ring
him: Hey Jasmin! What's Up?
me: UH, is this the service dude?
him: Yeah.
me: cool.

that way scared me. does this happen to anyone else? also i am going to be missing two night of hot tv action so nobody tell me who gets eliminated from antm (please let it be Jade, pleaseeeee) OR any OC haps until Friday! Im chilling with my bitches both tomorrow and thursday night and have to rely on my Moxxie to record the two very best shows ever ever ever ever ever. this post is pointless. so was the coffee i had cos i wasn't even tired. i was peer pressured! ok bye.

  ¶ 2:27 AM

  The OC post of the week Volchok Watch: bitch is still fine.

im stoked marissa went back to volchok's skanky ass. i don't blame that bitch. so kirsten is off the wagon (hot), marissa crawled into volchok's mattress (g-h-e-t-t-o) after he rented the Sound of Music (hot), ana is back with a hot wig on her face (ok, it's probably not a wig, but that shit looks like cabbage patch hair) (it's still hot though), seth is trying to get summer back (hot), and summer is going to prom with a korean superpopstar dude (hot). Dude, and there's only 3, THREE!!!!!!!!!!, episdoes left!!!! the previews promise, CHEATING (scandelous), BACKSTABBING (scandelous), and more OC DRAMA than your otherwise boring life can handle!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! don't turn your back on them now!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!



goddamnit, tv gets me everytime.
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oh yeah and in unrelated news, i have been super lazy about updating Sucks/Doesn't Suck - i'm sorry bitches!!! i promise an update by the end of this week!!!! you sluts are hot.   ¶ 12:58 PM

  63 HAPPY BIRFDAY to another of my favorite hot, useless, hot, [dead] heroes.....

"She was like a thin man in black leotards and a sort of boat-necked sweater, white hair ... she was such a strong image that I thought, that's it, it represented everything to me ... radiating intelligence, speed, being connected with the moment." -Patti Smith on Edie



ps-

dear edie,

i am really sorry that they picked sienna miller to play your hotness on the silver screen. that bitch is fug.

love,

jasmin

  ¶ 12:10 PM

  ...unto us a child is born.....
omg whores. the day has come. unfortunately, i am in no mood to write about it for several reasons....but mostly because i just came back from a gay piano bar (and that is gay as in homosexual and not gay as in, "that was gay") for old men that has exhausted me-not due to alcohol (i had water)- but because i spent the entire night trying to beat my friends at the porn game. my mind can't process anything that isn't a puzzle of half naked sluts and dudes. also, i'm kind of disappointed that the chosen one is a chick. i feel duped.

...Suri is totally an alien name, though.

....the brangelina baby better fucking bring it. i'm not about to be disappointed TWICE in one year!

farewell pillow/plastic stomach thing, i will miss you, you were such a good friend.......   ¶ 2:54 AM

  hduff

i love this picture. i don't know why, but i seriously love this picture. i think she looks hot. like a hot owl. a hot owl with hot teef. omg, this picture makes me giddy. ok enough.  ¶ 6:14 PM

  redeeming moment of the day

OMG bitches!! they have 'so noTORIous' ringtones at the VH1 website!!!!!!!!!!!!!! that totally made everything better!

if you havent seen an episode of 'so noTORIous' you are missing out on some hot quality TV!!!! i LOVE LOVE LOVE this show. it's funny and HELLO, LONI ANDERSON plays that bitches mom!!!! it's hot. also Tori has a black nanny, that lives with Loni Anderson, and she basically plays like a Mammy character. it's so messed up. it's most noticeable in the first episode. she totally talks Mammy style. i don't know if it's intentional or if i'm reading in to it, but it doesn't matter, it's hot either way.

anyway, i approve.  ¶ 3:08 PM

  a sluts rage AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.
SCHOOL IS TRYING TO DESTROY ME!!!!!!!!!

so, i'm trying to sign up for the very very very last classes i'll ever have to take in my entire life and the piece of shit website isn't letting me sign back in to add my last GE. BLAH!!!!! AND all morning it has been denying me access to the hottest classes summer school has to offer because of some crappy Major restrictions! LAME LAME LAME! EW, i seriously hate school.

ok so also, in the next few weeks i have to find time to watch the hottest movie in theatres right now, "Take the Lead" starring latin heart throb Antonio Banderas! hot right? i have to watch it in order to get extra credit in my Bronze Screen class so that we can support our people. that's basically what my professor said. yeah, the class is hot.

someone please shoot me. please?  ¶ 12:32 PM

  loves it

.....so the release of the dvd (finally) and the recent increase of season 1 reruns on MTV2 has made it MUCH easier to find this hotness on You Tube!! yay!

i hope you sluts are watching this show. it's the hottest shit on tv, like for realz-for realz. it would be a shame for it to get cancelled because you sluts aren't doing your part to keep crap on tv so it can rot our minds and bodies. fuck, it's the new millenium, get with it people....  ¶ 11:38 PM

  tv is getting hot & i'm going on a date with fabio tv always gets hot right when i have to get all crazy serious about crappy school. i am seriously into everything on tv. i'm even into the tori spelling show, so notorious!!!! i know bitches, EMBARASSING!! but the shows im most looking forward to are on MTV. MTV knows their reality and i am stoked about both the return of one of my all time faves, My Super Sweet Sixteen and the hottest new idea for a show since, er...8th and Ocean, TIARA GIRLS!!!! hells yeah! i LOVE LOVE LOVE pageant sluts. I seriously love the movie Miss Congeniality only because its about that stupid biatch Sandra B. being involved in a pageant! this tv show will be hottest thing you'll ever see, TRUST. you should watch when it starts: April 19th, 10:30!!!! i bet you some seriously fucked up shit will go down.


in other news, i have entered the Oral B Win A Date With Fabio contest. i am really hoping i win. I have already selected a bff to go with so im sorry to all you bitches who would have liked to be mine and fabio's 3rd wheel. this contest is something shady, for reals. this pic is sort of small and you cant see where it describes the contest so i will write it out because it's hot, it says:"Dreams really can come true, darling. Imagine you and a friend being whisked away to Los Angeles for a romantic date with Fabio. As if his warm embrace weren't enough to fill your heart with joy, you'll even enjoy spending $750 in spending cash!" DUDE, how can anyone resist this contest!!! i am seriously stoked. i think fate and fabio are on my side. they will be letting the winner know around May 5th....just in time for my birfday, which is three days after! then you will basically belong to Oral B and Fabio between June 3-June 5, and since i'm already in LA, they said they would send a limo to pick my ass up! HOT. you also get to stay in a hotel in LA and then you have your "romantic" date with Fabio at a "4 star restaurant". dude, and they pay you $750. oral b is turning me and my friend into prostitutes. high class ones. i better not get used to it.  ¶ 10:58 PM

  hallelujah. you better have watched on friday, biatches!!
  ¶ 9:04 PM